Have You Met . . . Abs?: American House Party

Watching Hollywood movies with house party scenes I thought that house parties were awesome, but once I began going to house parties at Uni and in my early 20’s I came to the realisation that English house parties were just lame, and I believe I now understand the two main cultural reasons for this.

Then I met my friend Zaira and finally experienced fun house parties, and at the time I thought these were 'The best a house party could get'…

Until, I came to live the American Dream! These people know how to throw house parties! When I got told I was invited to a house party, I wasn’t excited, due to the years of being socially accustomed to house parties being kinda average. Yet this party was certifiably on par with the Hollywood scenes, and I was metaphorically 'Wow'd in my pants'

Let me set the scene… I walk in and I am greeted by a ‘greeter’. A young gentleman in a nice jacket opens the door and invites me in. I then meet the host who I knew, and proceed to wish him Happy Birthday. As I walk through the main room I am visually confronted by a large projector screen in a darkly lit room with some kind of action Hollywood movie scene, with 5-8 people watching said movie. I was a little impressed thinking, this is pretty cool. I am told to keep walking, inititally I had thought this was the house party as I walked through the next door, as I am walking down some concrete steps which leads to another door. I open the door I see a room full of people dressed in 70/80’s gear. There are people sat around the edges, on couches, chatting away, and a few random groups of people dancing to ‘dancey/techno’ type music. Best of all though, the room was lit with UV light, and there was a surreal, almost hippy vibe throughout the room.

I had various conversations with quite a few people there and it was bi polar: There was a group of girls who believed I was not British and I was putting on the accent. I told these girls they were right, and I was going to acting school, and was upset about the accent after three years of studying I still couldn’t perfect the accent – gullable idiots. Then there were group of people who I discussed American Foreign policy and the perception of Americans and America from an external point of view.

I had deep conversations with a group of other people who I later realised were quite high on various intoxicating substances, but these people were really interesting and quite deep, off the plot, or a mixture of the both, what they definitely were is interesting and many a self amusing lols were had.There was also the various real life witches, or Wiccans as they refer to themselves, apparently they do not have talking black cats and Sabrina the teenage witch is not really their source of inspiration.

Outside the house, there was a big garden patio, here there was other types of amusement to be had, there was a large circular metal bin that was on fire warming the various people around. The randomness did not end here, it was here that I was first offered a ‘swingers session’. I respectfully declined; I hadn’t excused myself and took more than two steps away before the girl totally pinched my ass… Mmmm sexual harassment Panda would not be impressed!

Also outside there was a small swimming pool/Jacuzzi as well as a sex caravan. Yes, you read right, a sex caravan! This was exactly the same as a large normal caravan, you can see the back of it in one of the photos. However as you walk through the caravan and through a few folk in the first room, there was a bed in the ‘back room’. There was a sign next to the bed, which I am now wishing I took a photo of, but it said: ‘You may use this bed for fun or just to chill, but please be courteous and clean up after use.’ Say what you want about America or Americans but they know how to throw a house party!

I am uploading various photos so you can get a feel for the night and the amazingly surreal time I had: